Many people have told me that I'm a superficial person and I would have to agree for the most part. Invariably, when my friends and I see some pretty girl we go into the requisite guy talk going something like this:
"Oh dude, did you see that girl?"
"yeah man, the only problem is her _____ is too big/small/abnormal/etc."
I was just wondering why I have to be so nitpicky about stuff like that? Do girls do the same thing when they see a guy too? Then in that case I thought about the stuff girls would say about me and my friends. I'll use myself as an example:
"Oh God, did you see that guy?"
"Yeah, he'd almost be cute except for his _____"
The blank can be filled in with the following I can surmise
1. Large nose - My nose isn't as big as some Indian people's, but it is a bit on the ponderous side. My brother has a pretty big schnoz so I should be grateful
2. Short height - I can see this being a common problem. My dad is 5'4 and my mom is 5'2. Genetically, I had zero chance of clearing 6 feet. i try to compensate by staying fit and muscular, which is an insufficient thing to do when you're a munchkin like me. But hell Tom Cruise, Humphrey Bogart, and Tobey Maguire are shorties but they seem to do well for themselves.
3. hairiness - As any Kashmiri, I'm built for mountain living, but in the temperate American climate, it's proving to be unnecessary. I think all real men should have some hair on them; it's simply natural. A hairless chihuahua is unnatural for dogs just as is a hairless man. Women should stop demanding this of us. Regardless, I'm a Chia Pet.
Alright so there you go, I'm not a perfect specimen. Vain, I am. Excuse me, while I schedule some plastic surgery...
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